Why I moved to West Egg...

       All my life I was embarrassed of my upbringings.  I came from a poor family in a rural area of North Dakota.  I had always dreamed of being successful in life and my goal was to become a wealthy business man.  Eventually, I left home and I pursued my dream.  Once I met Daisy before I went into the war, I told her that I came from a wealthy family and lied about my past.  The only reason I did this was because I wanted to seem good enough for her.  She was a graceful and charming woman who lived a luxurious life.  I wanted to impress her and seem like I was a person of her kind.  After the war and after she married someone else, I moved to West Egg.  I did this because I heard she was living is East Egg and I wanted a second chance with her.  I knew that we belonged together and I didn’t want to give up on us.  I bought a mansion just across the bay from her house with Tom.  I knew there was still hope for us and our relationship, so I tried everything I could to draw her attention.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t reach out to her personally because I was too shy to show my face.  One thing I did know though was that if I moved to West Egg, I would have more chances to be around her.  She was the woman of my dreams and the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.  I would have done anything in my power to have her back in my life again.  

What I was thinking when I saw Daisy again for the first time...

        The last time I saw Daisy was before the war.  After the war, I hadn’t seen her for years.  She married a man named Tom and I always thought she had moved on and never wanted to see me again.  As years passed by, I wanted to see her more and more.  When I heard that my neighbor, Nick, was her cousin, I knew that he was my one chance to see her again.  He kindly set up a lunch where she would attend and we could reconnect after all the years.  When the time came for her to arrive, I quickly went into a panic mode.  Thoughts raced through my head and I wondered why I was doing this.  Once I heard her voice as she entered Nicks home, I convinced myself that it was a bad idea and I walked outside.  When I realized that was a mistake, I came back to the front door, walked inside, and locked eyes with the woman I loved once again.  She was even more beautiful than I had remembered.  I was so breathe taken and didn’t know what to say to her.  Her eyes stared into mine and twinkled with sunshine like they always do.  Nick left us alone for a bit and we got to talking like we used to.  It felt like time had stopped and I never wanted to leave that perfect moment with her.  We reminisced about our past and reconnected.  It was in that moment that I fell in love with her all over again.   

What I was feeling when I got shot...

       It was a beautiful day out, so I decided I wanted to enjoy myself and go for a little swim in my pool.  I was under a lot of stress after the events that had occurred the night before so I was in need of some calming down.  My pal Nick was with me for a while that night and day.  I decided to tell him my real life story because I trusted him enough to tell him the truth.  He was a very loyal man and I had always wished the best for him.  I was expecting a phone call from my girl, Daisy.  I had my butler keep the phone close by all day in case she decided to call me and sort everything out.  As I waited, I did a few laps in the pool.  I came up for air and heard the beautiful sound of the phone ringing.  My face lit up at the thought of it being Daisy and I took a moment to recollect myself as my butler answered the phone.  I thought of what Daisy was going to say to me and how we were going to be together forever after this phone call.  Times, however, drastically changed.  I heard a loud noise and felt a sharp pain in my left shoulder blade.  I looked down at my chest, touched my hand to it, and saw blood wipe off on my fingers.  My body went numb and my eye sight started to turn black.  As I started to lose balance, there was only one thought in my mind, Daisy.  I proceeded to fall into the pool with the beautiful image of Daisy’s face in my eyes.  

What I was feeling when Daisy hit Myrtle...

          The night when Myrtle died was one of the worst nights I have had in a while.  Earlier that day, I went into town with Daisy, Tom and Nick.  Daisy was going to tell Tom that she didn’t love him and she wanted to leave him for me.  Things, however, did not play out as I thought they would.  Tom and I got into a brawl of words and the evening went from bad to worse in the span of a few hours.  Daisy and I left town and headed back home before all the others did.  Daisy was distraught and nothing I could say would calm her down.  I was worried she did not want to be with me anymore because of the incidents that had occurred up in the plaza between Tom and me.  She wanted to drive the car to clear her mind, so I let her.  It was night time by this point and all the roads and houses were pitch black.  Daisy was speeding as she sobbed in silence.  We got out of New York and had just arrived to the Valley of Ashes.  Not many cars were on the road at this point and things were hard to see.  All of the sudden, I see this figure run out in the street that looked like a woman waving her arms.  Daisy didn’t stop or see the woman and kept going full speed ahead.  I grabbed the wheel from her and tried to steer out of the way from hitting the figure, but it was too late.  My heart stopped as I saw a woman crash into my windshield, shattering it, and then flying through the air.  I held Daisy who was screaming uncontrollably.  She kept her foot on the gas and kept driving as if nothing had happened.  I could not believe what my eyes had just seen.  I decided to take the blame for Daisy, she was too fragile and weak to take it herself.  I wanted to protect her with all my heart, even if it meant sacrificing my reputation and integrity.  At the moment of the incident, the only thing I could think about was how it was going to affect my relationship with Daisy.  I didn’t worry about Tom or Nick finding out the truth of what happened.  All I worried about was the woman I loved and what I had to do to keep her in my life forever.  

What I was thinking when I saw the green light...

          At night, I would go out on my dock and look at this green light blinking in the distance across the bay.  The light belonged to Daisy who lived on the other side of the bay from me in East Egg.  It was such a mysterious and simply green light, yet it meant so much more to me than that.  It symbolized that Daisy was in my presence every day.  She was so close to me, yet so far away.  That light at the end of her dock that would flicker every night showed me that she was just across the bay, living her beautiful life.  I would stand on my dock for hours, watching the light flicker on and off.  I would reach out with my hand, almost as if I could touch the light and pretend that it was Daisy.  Every time I saw the light, it was a reminder of how close she was to me.  She was just across the bay and it was that easy to go visit her, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it.  It was too difficult to see her again although all I wanted to do was be with her.  Some nights were clear and some were foggy, but the green light would still shine through it all.  You could see it no matter what.  It would glow over the water for miles and miles.  It was just like Daisy.  She was always so happy and full of sunshine, she would glow for the whole world to see.  It was almost as if Daisy was glowing in that light every night across the water.  Days and nights would pass, and the green light would shine on.  It seemed like that light was all I had left of Daisy.  It was the only thing I had in my life that was remotely close to being with her.  As I would watch the light every night, I gained a little more courage about Daisy.  It gave me a certain feeling that I would see her again and have her back in my life.  We were meant to be together and the green light at the end of her dock gave me hope that we would end up together again one day soon.  

Why I threw huge parties at my house...

           The reason I would throw excessive and extravagant parties at my mansion in west egg was to try and catch Daisy’s attention.  Everyone in New York would come.  There were lights, food, drinks and wonderful entertainment.  My intention of these parties were not to have fun and get out of hand every weekend.  I simply wanted to somehow reach out to Daisy and finally lock eyes with her again.  I would hope she would look across the bay and see the bright lights or would hear about it through word of mouth of a friend.  Unfortunately, she never seemed to show. I wasn’t sure if she hadn’t heard about the party and didn’t come, or if she heard it was being held at my mansion and didn’t want to come.  However, none of my guests knew who I was.  They would attend my parties unknowing of what I looked like or what I did.  Some would make up amazing and outrageous stories to explain my mystery.  Once I realized that my glamorous parties weren’t going to attract Daisy, I decided to invite my neighbor Nick Caraway to my next party.  He would be the only one with an invite because I wanted him to show up so I could have a chat with him.  Nick was Daisy’s cousin and I knew he could help me get into contact with her.  As I spent time with Nick, I grew to like him more and more.  He was a charming young man and had a good heart.  He set up a lunch with Daisy and we got back in touch once more.  Daisy was the love of my life and I would’ve done anything to get her back.  We decided we wanted to be together and spent more and more time together.  Once she came to one of my parties, I could tell she felt out of place and uncomfortable.  It wasn’t the kind of lifestyle she was used to and this concerned me.  It made me wonder if she was actually going to leave Tom to be with me because she was so used to the lifestyle she had with him.  If Daisy truly loved me, she would have left her cheating husband to be with the man that actually loves and cares for her.